It’s been over three months since I’ve shown up in this space. That may be the longest break I’ve ever taken. I didn’t exactly intend to take such a long break but it’s been much needed.
I needed a break to re-evaluate this space and to be able to see it clearly.
For a long time I’ve felt very lost in this space. I originally started this blog to create community and to make money even.
What I’ve realized within the past year or so is that the pressure to make money blogging totally sucked any fun out of writing or documenting my life. I haven’t been motivated to write because I haven’t had a clear direction with this space.
I keep toggling back and forth between this being just a place to document my life and between writing posts to make money. I haven’t been enjoying the process either as you can imagine. Not having a clear direction or purpose for this blog just feels confusing when I finally do sit down to write a post.
Recently, I’ve been in this season where I’ve been realizing that I get to curate my life the way that I want it to be (more on this soon). I don’t have to participate in an activity, such as blogging, if I don’t want to. I know that sounds kind of strange but let me try to explain.
Sometimes I see someone else that I look up to either in real life or online, enjoying or being successful at something and think that I would enjoy or can be successful at it too. I’m sure that’s not a rare occurrence but where it becomes a problem for me is that I forget to check back in with myself to see if I am actually enjoying whatever it is that I started.
I’ve been in a place of re-evaluating different areas of my life and whether or not I want to spend time or energy on them. When it came to blogging I realized that I wasn’t actually enjoying this little blog, which is why I’ve never been able to be consistent with it.
The pressure to be like other successful bloggers and to make money sucked all of the fun out of blogging. It also sucked all of the creative energy out of the process. Blogging was a chore instead of a hobby.
My new plan is to turn this space strictly into a hobby. Erase the pressure and do it for fun. I plan to write when I want to and about things that I’m interested in writing about.
I want to be more intentional in this space. I used to write posts on a whim and barely edit them. I want my posts to be more meaningful. I want to share my experience as a mother, a wife, a follower of Jesus and connect with others. I want to be proud of what I’m writing.
Let’s see how these changes affect my little space on the internet. I have a feeling it’s going to be a very, very good thing.
