• Faith

    If you’re ever wondering if God can accept all of you, read this

    February 25, 2016

    You guys I am so excited to tell you that I wrote my first guest post this month. It was on my February goals and I’m so happy that I actually accomplished it. It went live today over at Wendy van Eyck’s site ilovedevotionals.com.

    Wendy is writing this whole year about how to live “well” and what that means. I feel that this is the first step for me to ever getting it right – realizing that God accepts me the way that I am right now, flaws and all. If I don’t I realize that then there’s no room for growth.

    If this is something you might be interested in reading more about, click here to read my post. I’d love to know what your thoughts are or if you have any tips for me in this area.

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  • Faith

    You Have Already Arrived

    September 19, 2015

    Do you ever catch yourself wishing your life away? Not in a way where you wish your life was over, but in a way where you aren’t content with what life has given you now? Maybe it’s by always wanting the “new things” the world has to offer. A newer car. A newer phone. The latest fashion. Or maybe it’s not materialistic at all. Maybe you’re wishing for that next step of your relationship to finally happen. When will he finally propose? When will we ever be financially ready to have a baby? Or another baby? Or a bigger house? Why is it so hard to just stay content where we are? Isn’t that what Jesus calls us to do?

    I struggle with this more than I realize. It starts out small, one day looking at something someone else has on Instagram and feeling that little pull in my heart towards whatever that may be. For me, I struggle with being content where I am in my relationship – no matter what my relationship status is. When I was single all I wanted was to have a boyfriend, now that I have a boyfriend, all I want is to get married. So it starts out small, I see someone else’s blog who seems to have a happy marriage and I start desiring that. But the longer I dwell on their marriage and wanting it the more I find myself discontent with what I have now. It’s like I can’t focus on enjoying what I have because I feel that if I had more or something else then I’d be able to enjoy that more. It’s frustrating too because I want to be happy with where I am and I want to wait for God’s timing so why does this have to be so difficult?

    Just this morning I was sitting on my deck and I felt God answer this question and it was only then that I realized that I had done it again. I had been desiring to push forward and go ahead of him rather than just sit and love where He has me.

    So I made a list, for myself and maybe this will help someone else out too – of ways to be content. Ways to make sure that I can keep my heart in check and not run ahead of where He has me. Because my fear is that once God allows me to finally have whatever I think will make me happier then I will just set my heart on something else and continue to strive and desire for that and be discontent all over again.

    1. Seek His kingdom first- when we put God’s will over our life first, He promises to work everything else out for us and we don’t have to worry about earthly things because He tells us that it’s His job to provide that for us. If you are seeking God’s will for your life then what you’re experiencing is God’s best for you.
    2. Dwell on the good things you have- When we wake up with a grateful heart, it’s hard to keep wanting more because we’ll be too busy enjoying the things we do have. Every good gift comes down from God.
    3. Remember this life is short and temporary- We’re only here for a short period of time when you think about how long eternity is. I don’t want to be someone who is striving for the next thing when it’s all going to be taken from me eventually anyway.
    4. Spend less time on social media- Every once and a while I try to take a social media break because I can feel it in my heart that it can be where my discontentment comes from. There are even statistics that show how the more time you spend on social media, the more unhappy or discontent you tend to be. It’s hard not to want what others have when everybody posts about how great their lives are and how happy they are that they now have whatever it is that they’ve got.

    I’m starting to notice that the closer I get to the next season of my life is the time I struggle the most with not being content. When it’s so close but so far away, it’s hard to not to wish for the next thing. And I don’t think think that it’s bad to just wish for something else. I think it’s good to keep striving for things and reach our potential but I think the problem comes in when we start to want something more than we’re enjoying what we have at the moment. I think it’s important to always remember that everything we have is God’s and that even if we feel God is leading us towards something to allow Him to work and not hold anything too tightly.

    I named this post “You Have Already Arrived” because if you’re a Christian then you already have it all. Jesus should be our biggest desire and we should set our heart on striving to love and be more like Him, not wanting and wishing for more things. The things we’re wishing for will never truly satisfy like only He can anyway. You’re already here, there’s nothing more that you need to live a complete or happy life. God’s already given you His best.

    Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5

    But godliness with contentment is great gain. For we brought nothing into this world, and we can take nothing out of it. 1 Timothy 6:6-7

    Delight yourself in the Lord, and He will give you the desire of your heart. – Psalm 37:4

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  • Faith,  Marriage

    Why Marriage Is Not The Happily Ever After We Thought It Was

    September 17, 2015

    Now I’m not married or even engaged for that matter so I’m not sure if I’m truly qualified to even write this post but I’m going to attempt it anyway. It’s obvious based off my other posts that Tommy and I are pretty serious and that we even have been talking about getting married a lot lately. We both know that we want to marry each other, it’s just a matter of time and letting the details work themselves out. As with anything new that I am about to embark on I have been reading AS MUCH as I can about marriage because I’m the type of person who always wants to be prepared. My parents are also divorced and I want to learn as much as I can how to have a healthy, happy marriage since it’s not what I grew up around or know much about.

    The Most Important Thing I’ve Learned:

    Marriage is not meant to make you happy. Wait, what? Isn’t that what’s taught – no drilled into our heads since we were old enough to talk? Isn’t that what every Disney movie (with the exception of Frozen – Hallelujah!) is about? If you search hard enough, or wait around long enough, prince charming will come find you. And when he does, it’s going to be glorious and there won’t be anything left to worry about. You’ll have your happily ever after and everything will be perfect.

    But what happens when you wake up in the real world, next to a sinner – like yourself – and your prince charming does something you never would have imagined he would do? What happens when you’ve run into an issue in your marriage just two weeks in and you’re arguing all the time? Do you just give up because this isn’t what you thought married life was supposed to be like?

    I hope not. I hope you choose to fight more for your marriage than you fight with your spouse. I hope you are able to swallow your pride and apologize when you’re wrong. But more than that I hope you forgive – I hope you forgive even when you don’t want to, even when your spouse did something you thought you never could forgive them for. Because isn’t that what marriage is truly about?

    God gave us the gift of marriage to show us the beauty behind His love for us. It’s not meant to make us happy, it’s meant to make us holy. When we choose to get married, we are choosing to put someone’s needs before our own and sacrifice ourselves for another person. We’re choosing to put their happiness ahead of ours. We’re choosing to become more like Jesus. No wonder marriage isn’t the happily ever after we thought it would be. This is no easy task – I struggle with it already and I’m not even married yet.

    The most amazing part of marriage to me is the grace were expected to give to our spouses. When we say “I do”, we’re committing to extend grace through anything, no matter what. We’re expected to stare straight at our spouse’s weaknesses, the same weakness that have hurt us and say “Nope I refuse to leave, I’m staying and I’m still choosing to love you”. And the greatest part of it all is that we’re expected to do all this because Jesus has already done it all for us – and more!

    He’s looking at you right now saying “You – the messy, broken you that you don’t even like.. I want you. I want that part of you. Bring it to me and confess the brokenness – only I can heal you and I WANT to, more than you want to be healed. Come to me and I will give you rest.”

    This is why marriage is so glorious! Because we were made to reflect that beauty. We get to show that grace to another person – that even though you’re messy and even though you hurt me – I still love you and I still am staying no matter what. We’re set up in the perfect place to really put on display Christ’s love to not only our spouses but to the world around us and this is so so much better than any happily ever after the movies display for us.

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  • Faith

    Something I’m learning (The Hard Way Of Course)

    September 15, 2015

    Spending time by myself. For some reason lately I’ve forgotten that I need to spend time alone. I forgot the joys of having absolutely no commitments and just relaxing. Of watching a funny TV show or going for a random drive by myself. I forgot that this is what gives life to me.

    You see, I’m an introvert in the truest sense of the word. I crave time alone to process my thoughts and check my heart and desires. I’m realizing now when I don’t give myself this time, I let certain sins take control of my heart. I need alone time to weed out the bad desires that I don’t realize are there.

    For the past month or so I don’t think I’ve had a full day when I’ve had no commitments. I’ve wanted something so badly that I’ve set this desire in my heart and have been striving for it over God’s will for my life. It’s been coming out in little ways – getting really irritated when things don’t go my way, getting upset when I have had time to myself because I didn’t see this as beneficial to “my goal”. I didn’t even realize and now that I do I feel awful.

    When I spend alone time, for me it’s like filling up my car’s gas tank. It fills me up with joy and gives me the ability to love others well. What I’ve been doing lately has been like running on E and it’s been difficult. I’ve been cranky, and have been getting upset with everyone around me way too easily.

    The problem comes in because I don’t like the idea of how it sounds to have a day to myself. It sounds like punishment to be honest and so I’ve been avoiding it at all costs. Filling my days with as many “things to do” as I can. And maybe the reason I’ve been doing this is because I’m afraid to stop and listen to what God really has to say. I’ve been waiting on Him to answer a prayer that I’ve been praying for for years and the closer it seems to happening, the more anxious I get because I’m worried that it just won’t. (No idea if that makes sense but it seems that’s what I was believing.) I think by avoiding the alone time with God and myself I thought I would get to pick how things went and they would happen on my timeline. It’s kind of painful admitting all of this because I didn’t even really notice I was doing it until now but I’m thankful that God is still in control and doesn’t let us have our own way even when we think we know better.

    So I decided to make a list of things that fill me up and allow me to love others well so next time I notice that I’m feeling burnt out I can make sure to do some of these things. Or better yet, I will start to incorporate these into my daily schedule to avoid burnout all together 🙂

    • Read a book
    • Go for a run
    • Watch How I Met Your Mother
    • Write
    • Read other people’s blogs
    • Spend quality time with Jesus

    I’m thankful for a God who doesn’t give up on us even when it seems our true desire is not Him. I’m thankful that He is patient and waits until we are able to hear His voice again and is there waiting with open arms for us to come right back home and I’m thankful for His ability to set our hearts right again and on it’s true desire – Him!

    Has anyone else experienced this type of burnout? If you have, do you have any tips on how to make sure that it doesn’t happen again? Btw how adorable was Tommy’s guest post – if you missed it, you can check it out here. He makes my heart so happy.

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  • Faith,  Marriage

    Tommy’s Turn (An Extra Special Guest Post)

    September 13, 2015

     Hi guys. I’m super excited to share with you what Tommy has written for the blog 🙂 I was really excited when he offered talked about wanting to write a blog post and his post is so sweet I know you guys will love it. So without further ado – here’s my handsome, silly boyfriend:

    Hiya folks! This blog is going to be a little different than Ashley’s usual…. I bet you’re wondering why.  Let me start by introducing myself. My name is Tommy and I’m Ashley’s boyfriend. This is my first crack blogging and I’m really excited Ashley is letting me take over her cool new hobby; I’m also brand new to this blogging world so please go easy on me.

    Anyway I just wanted to share some quick thoughts on how grateful I am for my girly-friend. Since I don’t entirely understand the meaning of a segue-way I will be jumping right into this. Never in my life would I think I would have met such a perfect match for me as Ashley. This amazing chick understands, cares, loves, and guides me in ways I didn’t know were possible. When I’m lost in my faith, or beginning to stray, she is always there to offer such godly advice – it humbles and silents me. So for most of my life I have been a pretty quiet and shy guy, and never one to stand up for myself. Ashley has made me realize my true identity in Christ. Having the confidence in our one true savior has allowed me to really break out of my shell, and feel comfortable enough to be myself. What is so amazing about all of this is, even through my bumps and bruises, no matter how big my flaws , BOTH Ashley and Jesus have an unconditional love me. I hope you all one day understand that Jesus’ love pours out like a never ending river for you. Its FREE baby, its the hope of the world! I really could go on and on about Ashy but its time to wrap this little blog attempt up. Hopefully this was short and sweet, I really enjoyed writing it, and hope you enjoy reading. It’s time for some s’mores brownies! So I’m out. Sleep easy all.

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  • Life

    My Ideal Day // Blog-tember Challenge Day 2

    September 3, 2015

    So just to keep you guys updated, I got back from the Bahamas Monday night at 12:30 pm and it was THE BEST vacation ever. It was so fun and I can’t wait to write a post about it but until then I’m linking up with Bailey Jean at Brave Love Blog and attempting to blog every day in the month of September (long shot I think but still worth a try). Today’s topic is Your Ideal Day.

    This post couldn’t have come at a better time because quite honestly I have been nothing but a crank-pot since I got back from vacation. Yesterday I was EXHAUSTED from driving home from Pittsburgh (more on that later) and I felt like a zombie and today I think I’m just readjusting to being back in the real world after 5 days away and let me tell you, it is rough.

    But enough on that, now it’s time to think of wonderful things that make me happy so without further ado here’s:
    My Ideal Day:
    Morning:

    So on an ideal day my morning would start out very slowly because I am not a morning person (just ask my boyfriend ;)). I would have time to wake up at my own pace and have time no real duties to attend to all day. I would love to spend time at my desk, with the curtains open and the sunshine shining in. I would have a beautifully scented candle lit, right now something autumn-y would be perfect (so excited for fall to be starting btw). I would have a delicious cup of coffee and would be spending alone time with Jesus to set my heart on Him for the rest of the day.

    quiet time

    Afternoon:

    In an ideal world I would live only minutes from the beach so for the early afternoon, Tommy and I would head to the beach to spend some quality time in the sun together 🙂

    tommy bahamas
    sneak peak from the Bahamas!
    Nighttime:

    At night I would go for a target run with my best friend Kristin, and have one of our awesome life talks while we do it. I would be enjoying a nice cup of tea too. At home I would enjoy baked ziti for dinner with Tommy and our amazzzing dessert that we can’t get enough of – recipe is here if you wanna try too :). Afterwards we would cuddle and enjoy whatever show we are currently addicted to on Netflix until we fell asleep.

    pic collage 2

    And that would be it. It may sound unexciting and very simple but I tend to be a very simple girl and the little things are what make me happiest – like a delicious cup of coffee, my sweet boyfriend, a lovely trip to target, and a warm cup of tea.

    What about you guys? What would be a perfect day in your life? Are you simple like me or would you enjoy way more excitement or adventure in your ideal day? I would love to know 🙂

    Also, join me and attempt to blog every day in September! (This post is already a day late haha I started it last night but got busy so I finished it this morning.. oops)

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