• Marriage

    Jesus>Marriage

    November 4, 2016

    I can’t believe it’s November and Christmas is right around the corner. I’m really excited for the holiday season. I want this season to be filled with growth in my relationship with Jesus. I’ve been struggling for the past few months with my relationship with God, which I have shared a little bit about here on the blog. I want to keep striving through this tough season and keep seeking His face above all else.

    Getting married changes so much about your life. I know this probably seems to be the only thing I blog about lately but it’s honestly been one of the main things on my mind since May. It’s a wonderful thing in many instances. You get to live with your best friend. You always have someone to hang out with. You have someone to lean on in the hard times. It’s a time that’s full of new beginnings and new joys that you never knew were possible.

    But I want to share with you guys that marriage isn’t all roses and butterflies. I want to bring some light to marriage to anyone who may be reading this and thinking, “If only I could find someone to marry…”. Like I said marriage is a gift, and a great gift at that, but it is also hard and demanding at times. I don’t want anyone believing the lie that once you get married then you will be truly happy, or once I get a boyfriend, or once I get a boy to like me. The best thing that ever happened to me wasn’t getting married. It was realizing that the God of the universe loved me enough to die for me. Knowing I have worth to the God that created everything I see is such a humbling and awesome thing. Don’t lose sight of this.

    I used to think that once Tommy and I were married everything would be perfect. I knew I’d still have struggles and hard times but I thought that they wouldn’t be so bad because we’d be together. And hear me out, this just isn’t true. Trials are trials no matter if you’re single, married, divorced, or widowed. Each trial is unique in it’s own way and the only thing that really gets you through it, is to seek God’s face above all else. Seek God’s face in the midst of the trial and that’s when you will find true joy. I read so many blog posts about this same idea many times before I was married and I never learned until I walked it myself. If I can spare one person from believing this lie, that will be enough for me.

    If it is your desire to be married, keep pressing in and asking the Lord for this, but don’t believe that only then will you be truly happy. Being married can be hard, just like being single can be hard. Resting in knowing God is for us is what will get us through anything. Let me know how I can pray for you specifically if this is something you might be struggling with. It is close to my heart because it was and probably still is in some ways a personal struggle of mine as well and would love to encourage you along the way!

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  • Marriage

    Bliss Part 2

    August 21, 2015

    Hi friends 🙂 I just wanted to stop by and elaborate on my last post (if you missed it, you can check it out here). When I wrote that one I was having one of those days where I was so exhausted that I was having a hard time really focusing on getting out what I really wanted to say. I thought I’d try my best to try to explain a little more about my thoughts behind the post today but I’ve also been having I guess what you would call writer’s block. I can’t clearly get across what I want to write about lately and I haven’t really had any great ideas to write about either which has been kind of discouraging. Sometimes I even think that starting this blog wasn’t a good idea and that maybe I’m not all that great at writing anyway but I am going to persevere and see how things go.

    So back to the point of this post (hopefully this one will be a little clearer) – my heart behind the last post was that waiting on God specifically when it comes to a dating relationship is way more worth it than you could ever imagine it to be. Thinking back on the years I went through wishing and wanting and praying for a boyfriend are some what of a blur now. Looking back isn’t exactly a fun experience either because it reminds me of how much more I wanted a boyfriend or husband than I really wanted the Lord but it makes me really appreciate to be in where I am today.

    I took my relationships into my own hands for quite a while and had to go through quite a few heartbreaks before I was willing to admit that maybe God knows a better way. I am just so thankful that the Lord never gave up on me though and kept pursuing me despite my sin and eventually got through to my stubborn heart.

    I wanted to encourage those of you out there who might be in a similar season. Maybe you have taken things into your own hands and suffered the consequences, or maybe you haven’t yet but are really struggling not to. Being on the other end of the spectrum now, in a  relationship that is God-honoring and such a joy, I can honestly say that every moment of the confusion and pain of waiting will be more than worth it in the end.

    Running ahead of God and pursuing a relationship that is not honoring to Him may be fun for a season but usually ends in heartbreak. And even if it doesn’t, I can promise that a relationship outside of His design will never have the same joys that one with Him in the center of it does.

    And I want you to know that I only know this through experience. I’ve been in relationships that were not God-honoring and they do not compare to the one I’m in today. I went through the waiting process (sometimes gracefully, most times not) and on the other end I can tell you the only reason why it is worth it is because in that waiting process you learn that GOD IS ENOUGH. You learn that He’s all you need and how to make Him to be the desire of your heart rather than a husband (or wife). This then sets you up in a wonderful place to eventually be able honor and respect your future husband in the correct way rather than elevate him to be a god in your heart. It sets you up to have such a sweet relationship where you both can love and spur each other on to fall more and more in love with Jesus.

    I am so so thankful for my relationship with Tommy and how God uses him to continually point me towards Himself. I couldn’t ask for a more thoughtful and loving guy. He is always pursuing me and putting my desires before his own and I really don’t understand how I got so lucky. It’s never easy to wait on God, no matter what the circumstances are, but it is always worth it.

    Some things that really helped me in the waiting process was to read my Bible and cry out to Jesus when I was at my lowest. Tell Him how you feel, He is cares and is closer than you realize.

    The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. – Psalm 24:18

    Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you. – 1 Peter 5:7

    Something that also helped was reading books written by people who had been in my shoes and had good advice for me. Some of those books that really helped were:

    Praying For Your Future Husband: Preparing Your Heart For His – By Robin Jones Gunn

    Lady In Waiting: Becoming God’s Best While Waiting For Mr. Right – By Jackie Kendall

    Another thing that helped was talking to others about how I was feeling. I know we may be strangers but I have been there and if anyone needs just someone to listen and be encouraged I want you to know that I am here just for that. My hopes in writing posts like these are to help others and I would love to do that on more of a personal level as well.

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  • Marriage

    Bliss

    August 19, 2015

    A word I would use to describe how I feel about my relationship with Tommy. I’m not naive enough to think it’s because of how great of a guy he is, though that’s true. I also know that it isn’t because we are practically the same person, just different genders – though that’s true as well.

    I’ve been at this dating thing for quite some time now. I’ve always been one of those girls who wished and dreamed of the day that she got married. It’s always sounded like it was going to be amazing, but I also wanted it for the wrong reasons as well. I don’t come from the greatest of families so I used to be on a quest to get married so that I could move out and start my own family. Although God has corrected my view of wanting to get married, it took a lot of pain and heartbreak to get me to where I am now.

    Bliss would be the word I would use to describe my relationship with Tommy and I know the only reason it is this way is because I know that God is with us and growing us towards each other and towards himself.

    I want to encourage anyone out there who is struggling with singleness and doesn’t know if God is even there at all. Struggling to believe if He even cares about your desires to be married. I want to you to know that He is there and He cares. More than you could ever know. He wants more for your life than you do and that’s why He has you in this season. Don’t do what I did and take things into your own hands, it will only leave you more alone and hurt than you’re feeling now.

    Trust.

    God knows your desires and He wants you to know that He hears you and your prayers for the future. He wants you to trust Him to bring to pass whatever is best for you. Use this season to get closer to Him, singleness is only for a season.

    Lay your desires down at the foot of the cross.

    Let God fulfill you like only He can.

    It’s never easy but always worth it.

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